Baroness Juliane von Schmeling

Newsmaker Interviews
Tuesday, March 6th

When two or more parties need to come to a resolution, whether it’s divorce and custody, or whether it’s employee or neighbor disputes, contract disputes or other business matters, or even settlement determinations of financial awards resulting from litigation, professional mediation is ideally suited to arrive at a binding, legal solution.Baroness Juliane von Schmeling, BS, MBA, EJD joins WILK's Sue Henry to talk about how mediation works and in so many different situations it could help.


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Here here's a woman who should be by my side every day and. My life and I'm hosting a talk show here. Because she could say to me now Soo quick hits. Stop that kind of language I think president it's a look at what after looking at it I. Sometimes I guess I just like to fight so like to introduce issued to voice you've heard on on WAOK before because you've heard. Although baron ass because she has some commercial advertising that turn over the years here at W I'll okay. Julianne bond shortening is with us in the studio today but we like to car the fairness because it sounds sol. European and European Union and I wanna say dominant to. What about when people hear something like that today Jen you factor why. Well like I get all conserve the responses to that as a matter of fact when I first went on to buy my domain name this kind of funny enough picnics. Did you. Keep it clean as possible but I think every guy here there is out. I also wanted to buy it. Fairness. Dot com. And the fairness dot com and to have been purchased long before. By any woman in New York that. That's latex outfits. If it. Is it dead a totally different perspective than when I do obvious lately ally I went with the Dow Benson not been very happy with that. Little bit of a background about what would rise used to what you do for a living. On my team and I came to mediation and around. By the way. I was at ma. You can say a victim must stand off the legal system myself when my daughter's gone through horrendous divorce custody matter and at last and actually twenty years. But seven years into it. I AM. I realized and you to go to law school to defend myself I was absolutely broke and I couldn't do you know him as a Stalinist battle. That would memory and so when plus call. And during does see each year so I ain't I learned a lot there but I also learned that there was another way of dealing with. Conflict. On anywhere and so I sort of focusing on an alternative way of resolving conflict by them litigation. And and then after graduating from law school assignment business. And it ad agency and business consulting firm. And I myself haven't had to stay met my my focus has shifted into the mediation practice that the fairness and down. I just simply. Found that mediation. Is just so much more effective and quick care and any conflict involves emotions and people and it's human nature and all the paperwork is is is just inflates that the conflict and a dispute and that. Hostility and things but in in mediation you have. Ability to address the issues. Face to face. And so many cases it's actually not about what's on the paper it's about something else that that much steeper much steeper. And the mediation because all parties have can speak. Voice there their opinions than voiced their concerns. The issue is can actually be resolved and often times mediation is misunderstood as. Oh it has to be economical ball and everybody has to agree and it's not legally enforceable and Ausmus unfortunately have been carried on and still to this day and that's something I'm constantly battling but. There's nothing further from the truth you can mediation you can resolve things and then their legally enforceable and that's in the in the divorce arena as well as the M. Corporate arena. And tin. Schools of course it and who would have a little bit of different application that spells for the workplace mediation. And peer mediation where in other resolution in the end doesn't need to be legally enforceable it just needs to be happening really witches. The real core to things Anemia an example. May be something that you worked on you've been called in and I was kind of difficult to resolve personality conflicts or whatever and just give me an example without getting too specific cannot can't get too specific obviously because of confidentiality. Issues which is also another thing we adhere to privacy and confidentiality as mediators to. Just like lawyers duke. I am. While bam one particular case. The M. People weren't getting along in the company and workflow ahead. And men had become very complicated and the panel tailing and and and the hostility was just increasing where it is active salad toss was going on. And knife was tired and went in and started interviewing everybody and then. Started to bring in the parties together and then I realized that. The actual issue when much deeper and lost a lot more people. And I was able to assess that and relatively quickly in bombing was a few weeks I would go and conniving couple days then and then. Because as the media era have pretty much free rein enough what want to talk tube which is great doesn't have to be a party that's part of the club officially part of the conflict. So when I feel and and I haven't come back content and market research in consumer research Sami able to dig a little bit further and I find there's there's an issue. And done. Actually got to the core and then made suggestions. You know talk to the people themselves they came up with some suggestions that NASA facilitating. Mediator I'll also makes suggestions for solution and we came up with a solution that worked for anybody and every so often when I go visit there. I can't like the world treatment comes at a time but one because I brought peace back to the workplace there and done. Ditches are happy and working together again and we did have to remove one person. But. Now person must Ernie was one foot out anyway but you know instigating wherever possible. When you. Go into a situation like band you met with trepidation at the on the kind of warm up to you when they they realize that they can maybe work through an issue that is beneficial. To most. What we have to understand too that. In order to resolve conflict we have to girls Europe and a lot of companies and honest schools. We we're looking act. People trying to. Resolve the issues by. By sort of negating. That the problems by taming peopled by a calming them down things like that but it doesn't resolve did the court issued actual conflict. In order to get. To get tour of pop is different solution along lasting women resolution. You have to go through the conflict everything that is a problem house to be brought up. And resolved individually. And together. In order to to make this long lasting and effective and that is what mediation ends. When you look at some of these situations across the country involving these very tragic school shootings I know that you have. Some ideas does. Does the the concept of mediation is that. Actually. In some schools in the country either on the you know on the high school level award the collegiate level diss you see people actually war is kind of a warming up to the idea of what you get jazz doesn't matter. A fact not a parts of the country it's it's it's are any out. Of a viable. Com hard of authentication. As a matter of fact in one of my friends and actual men terror. Kaine nodding in in Arizona. Her phone has been ringing off the hook ever since the Florida and shooting. She. SI do a facilitates smead heats and conflict coaches and and that's some programs in the schools and it and and it's. If it's this much needed in high schools. Middle schools as soon colleges really because you're dealing with with young people who are. Truly ill equipped to deal with conflict to deal with emotions. Particular you read the feeling of rejection. Which she has been so. I mean Internet has not been helpful in this whole thing in me to go into great detail on that obviously. OK so. And and a lot of questions about the us. Is this mediation should this be a skill set that is taught. Too. High school appears. Some of the students perhaps there. And involved in student government student council clubs organizations groups. To. Recognize. Who in the setting. Is experiencing. Rejection and alienation. Basically brining this apparel. We're looking at. Teaching. Conflict. Resolution and an and caught and reading about conflict but the same chemists and mediator becoming and and we deal with the. With the individuals that's wild two and what I would prefer to this conflict product so we want to set up programs for. Teaching. Students peer mediation themselves. But at the same time which is right now needed even more. Is. Foster come in and and deal what what what's there at this moment what issues are there at this moment and you have to understand too. The administrators guidance counselors principles are are sort of restricted of what they can do and how effective that can be because. For starters cannot necessarily. Trust that ask somebody that they can. Confide that the students can confide in because everything. At some point goes into there and student file. If if their if their problems and it seemed against concerts and so on but as a mediator. We tummy in there we do our work. And the and that. Everything what I was told to us and and and confidence. Leaps with us it all the details leaf week to simply. Work in there and to. And facilitate. A resolution facilitate. A trust setting facilitate that they can understand. That they can speak in confidence. And which which now kits are so apprehensive about this because of the social media you know Myanmar prime an expectation of privacy anywhere. And preference hang it out to one and I mean day I have to be dressed and and made up properly because when other friends might just shoot at. But at a snap Chad and here there are bad hairdo is all over the place I mean we have zero expectation of privacy anymore. So as a mediator and that's one of the first things we instill in all the students that but have they say to us. Remains confidential. Which also and it fosters. Bad team. Students that cease something that's off. Feel compelled to actually say something. I mean that they're shooting at advice market there that there are signs that ever suite where. But in nobody had the courage. OID empathy or what average two to do something about it and then Florida was very very similar mean Alice just beyond tragic. I am. Had a lot of things Sarah a lot of things that happened could have been averted. By students learning. Empathy. I'm learning courage. And also fitted to shoot himself. He could've used some reality check training in terms of the video gaming that you know I I see that's that's another thing in my very frustrated with when I when I see it. The reality and virtual reality to lines have. Have them become so blurred. That is one of my fears for the future by the way as the people will not at some point be able to tell the difference between what's real and what's not guessing we're starting to slip into that. Talk about that reality. The reality check what is what is that and how does that work. My reality check is basically that you you take kids that are addicted or play way too much video games. Into a hospital. A live show them somebody after an accident of you know they're they're so used to. On knots with their with their games are blowing up anything and everybody and objects that look like people. And then when they're done without our recent level are got killed they hit the reset button. Okay that's how life starts to work for them. Day in there is no reset button and night I remembered seeing that Florida. Our breasts. And his lawyer shortly after I said. He's sorry now he's he's remorseful I'm like that's exactly it. No sense of how awful reality of what that would do yes he would Candace aggression and his anger out. But there was known to all over and and and schools even nowadays we have. We have so many armed. Applications have that to all of our up everybody get in praised everybody getting a trophy all these kind of things that. The accountability is kind of gone but also the reality check to me is. Teach students what happens when when you're doing something. In real life. In order mean and then the other thing is I think it's very important and even the adults have kind of forgotten about this. We cannot apply what what happens in Vegas stays. And they use anymore to the Internet it's just not there snap Chad is not. Secret. It doesn't disappear after you send a anything and everything that was ever posted to. To the Internet. No matter what platform. Is there for eternity. And it and the worst part is. Privacy of a few young people. It's just has been destroyed and mean there's a private chat between two people and their mad about something in their upset about something so there. They're very frank and next singing and now they can't manage other. I'm not some screen shots he's conversations and now since the mark ever they want to even post am so. But that's an invasion of privacy which is so gigantic issue but nobody respects that or understands set anymore and those kind of things need to. Be taught in the separate curriculum. In the schools are with them baron ash Julianne. Bond spelling who is so local but does work all over the place about and mediation. All right we have 1126 years WAOK and it's our pleasure to welcome the baroness tour studios today. And that she has some great ideas that we're gonna talk about of for the school setting Julianne Von smelling is her name and she does practice. Locally she became interested in mediation and she believes. That the the administration of schools could benefit greatly from this. Type of education on how to resolve conflict tray yes except that has seven outline how you think. That would work with them yes. I'm I'm. And simply thinking it it's time there's and we know now that no school is immune from. From these potential massacres. And I think it's that opportunity. But also the duty of school administrators. Principals superintendents. To become proactive. Lou we're all aware that the gun. Industry had a gun laws are not going to change any time soon even though there are some as you mentioned last week. And there are some private T. Companies that have taken. In not aggressive step in the direction. And that also not at mental and and the vetting process is this going to be a slow process can't get no better. And his suggestions from from some to bring in vets into. Into the schools you know after they retire in their forties. Fully trained to another option and them but we also now that the am and that's gonna take time and and another another issue is that them. Health care. It dish is not enough funding in and that and that hip bylaws have made it extremely difficult. To to cut through red tape. Dat. I feel that I'm a more urgent. Need is there. To protect our children. On whether there and connect garden or in the college are ready. By resolving the actual issue at their root goal. In and that's where mediation and conflict coaching and and setting up programs. Comes and it's completely viable. It's inexpensive in comparison to other things. And it's extremely effective that it resolves to issues right at their core make. This mad at whom why are they end and kicking kids out of school obviously is not helpful because number one we lose track of them on number true. Dave. They continue on a path that. We can't control and they are not getting help on their we'll never get better so. To set up programs in in the schools. I think to me this is urchins and needs to be done rather. Yesterday and then tomorrow and they are trained people out there. That are able to do this and we're all over the country. We're all passionate. One. Trained experienced. Educated to. And know how to do not know how to help I mean the first thing he's become an and we assessed really what's going on in particular case and he of cultural conflicts you have. And clicks Hewitt house. Lot of discipline high to argues. Almost anything except play into it but every school is different every setting is different. So there's snow. Arms ice one size fits all that's for sure so you need at a person that's that's trained and that person is also capable then. Of training. The people there in the schools. To set up these programs at their that there are some longevity in that it resolves tees issues. For the future and eliminates the actual problem before it becomes the actual issue before it becomes a problem I think that's. That's where a missing out renowned it's being done across the country are pretty. And I'm hoping that beacon into you said in this area and I'm hoping that I find some open ears and town. Administrators and a willing to talk to to me and my colleague next. Even an setting where you might command at the ad behest of like a PTA or something to give my presentation. Two parents yet because that may be very helpful as well we'd come and not at night and name wasn't mandatory AB you can just people. Here's some things the EU may be able to do to. Who flicked mare and we have to teach. Children and their parents and teachers. What conflict really is where very conflict turned from culture to begin with I mean we know that media. Thrives on conflict sonus on this sends a sports. And we we have to learn that conflict can be good. Com. By the many cases it's packed ample we have to learn to deal with an and an MR. Progressive fashion a more. Construct a fashion. Aaron if people want to reach out to you how can they do I have to website some Scranton mediation dot com. And that parent has got bids than he does is important thing yes you may go another thing you don't put. Be nice the end of you know are saying is that we just want you to be aware. But it's great to talk to about this kind of issue I think it's important and I think. That sometimes we over think everything that we need to get back down to some of the things have worked very well on the past. While you know looking at the modern world at the same time it's like that duality that we need to solve in the middle to get people to. Hapless conflicts with miniature agreeing to come in today and offering. To talk about this I think it's fantastic. Thank you Sarah homage to give me the opportunity to. To let our listeners now that that there are other options the fairness are celebs local history. Yes and that's one of the other things first year. Around to a town and we blew I've seen him many of the things and looks very were looking at architecture grave stones or whatever and that's a great to see you in person again and Julian has been championing guesstimate Tony Burks groupie I and two behind I don't know how to get a nanny Gao.